What if Nothing is Wrong?
Have you ever honestly asked yourself this question? I was just sitting here thinking about how my mind naturally drifts to thoughts of love.
I think about love a lot! I think about the man I’m with, how much I love my cat, and how amazing my family is.
My mind daydreams about this and then thinks about being in a foreign place, laughing gleefully with my husband in the future.
I see us cuddling later in the night.
I will just stare at my cat while he naps in the sun and lose myself in love.
After following this train of thought about how much I think about love, I immediately start having thoughts about it being wrong!
Isn’t it insane how our mind turns beauty into a negative?
For example, Do you wonder what the angle is when someone does something nice for you?
When your life is going really great, do you secretly wait for bad news?
What about when you are watching a movie and you can predict an accident coming because everyone is too happy?
Our minds are so programmed to seek out the negative.
I slept in this morning and was having such sweet dreams.
Then, my mind started worrying about when I would workout and going through a list of bills to pay.
It couldn’t just rest in the moment, enjoying the sound of the wind outside while I was warm under the covers.
It could have decided to focus on the birds or the feel of loving arms wrapped around me. No, it wanted to jump way into the future and chomp on unnecessary worry.
There are so many moments in the day that we could fully immerse ourselves in if only we could stay out of the future or judgment of the past.
What if this moment was enough? What if there was nothing wrong right now? What would our mind be left to do?
What if there had never been anything wrong?
What are you thinking about right now?
What thoughts are you following?
Are they taking you into the future? Are you replaying a scenario from the past?
We like to justify thinking of the future because we convince ourselves we have to. We make it a requirement of being productive.
If we don’t take care of everything, it might not be taken care of, right? This was a big one for me being a manager for many years.
My mind lived in the future, but when I was forced to let go completely in the present moment, I found there was a greater ease in how issues were resolved.
When I would finally let go, I’d find joy in the flow. I’d stumble into synchronistic meetings and somehow it would all work out even better than planned.
It did not take long to realize my idea of planning for the future was really just a way to feel like I had control over my life.
However, just when I felt completely in control and prepared for anything, life would make a mess of my plans.
Sometimes the more out of control I’d feel the better it all ended up.
It is not necessary for us to control anything but it is necessary for us to find balance.
When we are fully present in each moment, we will find ourselves doing what is needed which could be planning the next meeting or it could be taking a coffee break to breathe in some fresh air.
We do NOT have to figure it all out ahead of time.
What does balance look like?We can look to nature to see the order that happens when there is
We can look to nature to see the order that happens when there is
We can look to nature to see the order that happens when there is balance. We see the elements balancing constantly.
What about all the chaos in nature? What about the extreme droughts that turn into raging wild fires as we wait months without any reprieve?
Then, after the fires have destroyed acres of land, we hear of a monsoon season devastating another part of the land.
Is that part of it? Is chaos just as necessary to finally establishing harmony?
I tend to think that when things get tipped so far out of balance, chaos happens, destruction takes over and then there is a return to balance.
What if there was a consistent level of balance at all times? Would chaos still exist?
This is a tricky one because chaos and destruction cause us to feel our shadow aspects. We spend most of our time trying to avoid or ignoring our shadows. These are the parts of us that we have repressed. They are the hidden parts in the dark. We only like to show our positive beautiful parts and hide away the rest, causing compartmentalization of the other parts. We try to keep them hidden in the shadows.
We spend most of our time trying to avoid or ignoring our shadows. These are the parts of us that we have repressed. They are part of the whole and need to come out.
They are part of the whole and need to come out. If we deny them for too long, chaos happens, then destruction, then a rebalancing of energies.
These aspects are the hidden in the dark. Most of us are accustomed to only showing our positive beautiful parts and hiding away the rest, causing compartmentalization of the other parts. We try to keep them hidden in the shadows.
Most of us are accustomed to only showing our positive beautiful parts and hiding away the rest. This causes compartmentalization of the other parts. We try to keep them hidden in the shadows.
This causes compartmentalization of the other parts, but they never go away. We just deny them as long as we possibly can until it all comes crashing down around us.
We just deny them as long as we possibly can until it all comes crashing down around us in absolute chaos.
IF we could learn to accept all of it, maybe we could sustain a healthy balance and avoid the chaos.
How do we do this?
Learning to Forgive
Perhaps if we could learn to forgive ourselves for being imperfect we could begin to accept the unacceptable parts.
If we truly can believe that nothing is wrong, we can open to more love.
Can we forgive ourselves for being dishonest or hurting others? This is a scary thought because if I forgive myself will I leave myself open to being hurt?
This is a scary thought because if I forgive myself will I leave myself open to being hurt? If we all forgive ourselves what will happen to morals? Won’t we be creating mass chaos?
If we all forgive ourselves what will happen to morals? Won’t we be creating mass chaos?
Won’t we be creating mass chaos? Can you remember ever being forgiven? What did that feel like?
I remember it softening my heart and creating a closeness with the other person.
It actually opened my heart.
Can we be okay with being ugly inside and out?
Can we allow the shame to melt away through absolute acceptance?
Through forgiveness, we can sink into more acceptance allowing ourselves to be whole again. We don’t have to do this all at once. We can be gentle with ourselves.
We don’t have to do this all at once. We can be gentle with ourselves.
We can continue to ask ourselves, “What if nothing is wrong?”
Each time we notice wanting to hide a part of ourselves, we can invite a little forgiveness into that area.
We can bring compassion in and allow self-love to grow.
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